Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Careful not to trip over your imaginary veil…


One would think that from how many times I have blogged about my friend’s weddings recently, I would have my future wedding already planned out from where and when I would get married, what I would wear, what we would eat, etc. etc., just insert groom here.

That is not the case.

I have maybe 3 or 4 sentimental things that I know I want in my wedding or incorporated on my wedding day but that’s it.

I feel like planning a wedding out before you are engaged is bad luck. In fact I avoid all things wedding on Pinterest for this exact reason.

Just because at 14 years old we thought we wanted to get married in a huge princess dress with fairy sparkles and N’Sync playing as we walked down the aisle… it doesn’t mean that’s what we are going to want as an adult.

Weddings are about two people celebrating the commitment of their futures together. 
Two people.
Two different personalities.
Two different styles.
Two lives… becoming one.

A wedding should reflect and embrace that combination. It should reflect who the two of you are together. The lives you live. The things that are important to each of you, individually and together. And most importantly why you love each other.

I can definitely tell you that a princess dress and fairy sparkles are NOT why I love my boyfriend. And if he one day becomes my husband… there absolutely wont be any fairy sparkles… they would just get caught in his beard.

Weddings are a special, wonderful, magical time. And I believe that, when the time is right, we should embrace the chance we get to plan the day to celebrate marrying the person you love more than anyone else in the world.

Love is different for each couple. Love is one of the most amazing emotions we get to experience as people and no one can define your love for someone else but you. A wedding is the time to express that and share that feeling with your friends and family.

It’s not about the cake or how tall it is. It’s not about how much you spent on the wedding or how big your white dress was or that you had it at the most lavish vineyard you have ever heard of. It’s about being so lucky in life that you found someone who is your other half and you can’t imagine living the rest of your life without them. So much so that you want to read aloud your vows… in front of everyone you know… that you are two souls now joined as one.

You can’t plan that day before you truly feel that way. 

Maybe my theory is wrong. And maybe its why at almost 30 years old, I’m not married or engaged. But you know what… I’m okay with that. It will happen for me when it’s the right time. And it will be great.


terra said...

You're spot on. The wedding is one day, one day in what will hopefully be a long and wonderful marriage. It's the marriage that matters the most, I think, not the wedding. Of course that doesn't mean there shouldn't be a celebration, but I think we put so much emphasis on it these days, in getting everything absolutely perfect, that sometimes we lose sight of the fact that a wedding is a special occasion to mark the start of a partnership, with two people who managed to find each other in this great big world.

Kelly L said...

I have a wedding board on Pinterest because, I don't know. I started it when I was single because I was reasonably certain I was going to turn into the crazy spinster cat lady so it didn't matter. Now it feels awkward to have. Besides, you're right - a wedding should be about the pair of you. Just because my hypothetical wedding is pretty and wonderful, doesn't mean it reflects our collective tastes.

But it's fun to plan things, I guess. It's a creepy weird hobby, but there you have it.